Dorothy Parker
If you want to see what God thinks of money, just look at all the people He gave it to.
Dorothy ParkerYou can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think.
Dorothy ParkerGratitude - the meanest and most snivelling attribute in the world.
Dorothy ParkerLove is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away.
Dorothy ParkerI require three things in a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.
Dorothy ParkerI shall stay the way I am because I do not give a damn.
Dorothy ParkerHow do people go to sleep? I'm afraid I've lost the knack. I might try busting myself smartly over the temple with the nightlight. I might repeat to myself, slowly and soothingly, a list of quotations beautiful from minds profound; if I can remember any of the damn things.
Dorothy ParkerIf you're going to write, don't pretend to write down. It's going to be the best you can do, and it's the fact that it's the best you can do that kills you.
Dorothy ParkerAll those writers who write about their childhood! Gentle God, if I wrote about mine you wouldn't sit in the same room with me.
Dorothy ParkerLook at him, a rhinestone in the rough.
Dorothy ParkerThe sweeter the apple, the blacker the core. Scratch a lover and find a foe!
Dorothy ParkerThat would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.
Dorothy ParkerSalary is no object: I want only enough to keep body and soul apart.
Dorothy ParkerIt's a small apartment, I've barely enough room to lay my hat and a few friends.
Dorothy ParkerI don't care what anybody says about me as long as it isn't true.
Dorothy ParkerEnjoyed it! One more drink and I'd have been under the host.
Dorothy ParkerFour be the things I am wiser to know: Idleness, sorrow, a friend, and a foe.
Dorothy ParkerDucking for apples - change one letter and it's the story of my life.
Dorothy ParkerI am never going to be famous...I do not do anything. Not one single thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don't even do that anymore.
Dorothy ParkerWhen asked to use the word 'horticulture' in a sentence: You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.
Dorothy ParkerThey sicken of the calm, who knew the storm.
Dorothy ParkerWork is the province of cattle.
Dorothy ParkerThe only "ism" Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.
Dorothy ParkerThe two most beautiful words in the English language are: 'Check Enclosed.'
Dorothy ParkerThat woman speaks eight languages and can't say no in any of them.
Dorothy Parker